In my last post I wrote about setting up your profile so that it will appeal. In this post, I’ll look at how to approach someone you think you might like.
As in my previous post, I write from a woman’s point of view about men. If a woman is reading this, feel free to reverse the pronouns.
Any social media is a reflection of the real world. At times people approach me saying they want to be friends, even, on a few occasions, proposing marriage. This is the equivalent of walking up to a complete stranger in the street and saying, “We’re in the same place at the same time. Wow! this must be destiny. I’m so excited we’re going to be friends!”
No, it isn’t. Social media is merely another way of making initial contact with other people, albeit people in a completely different geographical location. It has little or nothing to do with Destiny or Fate.
Guys, please note that sexual comments, especially on a time line (which is public) are going to look very similar to harassing a woman in the street and are unlikely to be perceived favorably. It’s probably a good way to be blocked.
People who decide they are close friends based on a few direct messages aren’t much better. Instead of harassing a woman in a street, they’re now doing it in a shop or a bar.
So how can you approach someone, without offence, and with a real chance of making actual physical contact eventually?
How would you go about it in a public place?
In my last post I wrote about finding people with similar interests. Let’s take this a step further. You’re interested in Country Dancing. You see a few other handles come up regularly. You can click on the handles, and find out more about the people behind them from their profiles and their timelines.
Comment, in public (no DMs yet!) on their comments in threads. Build a public relationship.
The key word here is public. This process is equivalent to being introduced by a mutual friend. Conversation ensues.
When the conversations – note plural, as this may not be a fast process – have reached the stage of familiarity, then AND ONLY THEN feel free to DM and take the conversation to the private sphere. By this time you may have several people you’re talking to, so it will be worth the wait.
DO NOT immediately ask for other contact information, such as an email address – unless, of course, she offers it. If you do this you will come across as a fake or a crook.
Remember to have fun with the whole process. Life is too short to be serious.
My name is Jane New and I write erotica. Check out my books on this site while you’re here. I can be contacted on JaneNewRomanticFantasy@gmail.com